Thursday, December 12, 2013

Confessions, Failings and Feeling Alone

I feel like I'm failing a lot of the time.  The list of things I want to be doing and can be doing never seem to completely correlate.  I both hope I'm not alone in this (so I would feel less alone) and wish I were (so that other out there could be getting it all done)... if that makes any sense.  I'm head over heels for my job.  I'm pretty sure I couldn't be more in love with a job yet I feel behind at times.

Might be TMI but I decided long ago that when I started this blog that I would be transparent and so you are stuck with my thoughts... well not really you could at any point click the "X" on the top of the screen... let's be honest: I wouldn't blame you.

I want to be taking over the world.  I want to be helping my couples more and have more couples I can help.  I breaks my heart when I hear stories of photography gone wrong.  Whether the photographer failed them or the budget for their wedding led to trimming certain areas.

Truth time:  I am going to say something here and I am saying at as a former bride and person who has seen the hurt and not as a wedding photographer... The only thing you have left at the end of a Wedding day are clothes and photos.  If you take all the time in the world getting every detail right but then have a inexperienced or poor quality photographer what was the point?  Your memory is the only thing left to hold those memories.  I don't say this for you to hire me or any particular photographer just to put it out there.  The food will be "processed", the favors will about 40% be left behind, the flowers will wilt (though they are beautiful and I'm a huge fan!!!)... Just something to think on as you figure things out.

Meanwhile back on the trail I started, I have loved this year.  Each couple unique and amazing and I can't wait to continue our friendships.  But I sit here planning out this next year and I'm nervous.  Nervous about what is to come or not come?  Will it be another slow year?  Will all I have done make a difference?

I'm not sure of all the steps.  I want to know them. I'm a planner... not sure if there are others out there like me be HOLLA!  I want to know what each step will be and where they are all leading and I think this is reasonable... even if hasn't happened one day in my life... it could happen.

But instead I will focus on what I can know and I can do: my next steps.  There is no point letting myself worry of those things I can't change but instead I will take joys in the things I can.

Remember this month amidst all the hustle the "reason for the season" and all that jazz.  Breath in the crisp air and drink a hot chocolate.  The small things in life are what make up the memories that last!

Live. Love. Loud.

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